Is what you say you want, what you really want?
Yeah, might need to read that a couple of times to understand it.
I was sorting through some laundry the other day, and listening to Stitcher, my newly found friend.
On this particular podcast, an interviewee spoke about how she has her goals on a whiteboard in plain view in her home office, and didn’t care who saw them.
The way she said it prompted me to wonder how sometimes the things we say we want are the things we are supposed to want, but not necessarily an accurate depiction of what we really want.
Take goals, for example. How lofty is it to declare that you would like some more quality time with family, or to give up sugar.
Yet, when you do get some extra time, chances are it will go to Facebook rather than your barely conversational toddler, and any thoughts about giving up sugar go out the window at the first offer of a cup of tea (surely one tiny spoon doesn’t count …?).
But let’s face it, how many of us would declare uninterrupted pajama day as a goal? Yet, I know several of us who crave just that – a guilt-free do-nothing day.
Other goals we might have but are too shy / scared / embarrassed to share can include everything from wanting a promotion or more money to world domination – the latter being my not-so-secret goal.
Is it the fear of being judged?
Or that we think we might not be up to it?
Is it just sheer pessimism?
Whatever the reasons for having your secret wishes not be outwardly pursued**, know that you are unwittingly running two separate, perhaps even conflicting agendas.
** Wishing bodily harm against that annoying colleague / boss / in-law / neighbour doesn’t count as a secret wish. We already know you’re evil. Just kidding.
Remember what we say about people who might have a hidden agenda? Yeah, that’s you.
If you are not transparent about your real goals, you are hiding your real agenda from yourself.
And that, dear readers, is never a good thing. There is untold stress generated when you are out of sync with yourself.
Back in the laundry room, I checked pockets for any surprise cash or inky ballpoint pen (you never know), loaded and started the machine.
Then, back in the study, I pulled out my Trello board, going through the cards under my “Big Picture” list.
I took some time adjusting each card to make sure the vision (the why) matches its corresponding goals (the what).
I’d be lying if I said they all already matched beautifully.
However, having spent the morning doing some tweaking, I feel re-energized and, woo-woo and zen as may sound, totally re-aligned.
So. Does your why match your what(s)?